Stress Management

What is the answer for the many people who think they have too many problems to be able to relax?

Deal with them, and make them go away! Putting off facing an unpleasant situation or trying to avoid things we don't like to do only make the situation worse, and the longer things remain unresolved, the more stress you'll feel. If you've been avoiding an issue, sit down and write up a plan on how you'd like to resolve it - then follow your plan and deal with the problem. Sometimes, we make things worse than they really are in our minds and you may find out that what you thought would be hard to handle isn't really that big a deal after all.

Do people deal with stress in the same way?

The answer is yes and no. Everyone is different and we all have our ways to cope with pressures, but there are some distinct patterns of behavior that emerge when people are stressed. One type of personality is "extreme anger," and you'll see these types of people try to find ways to vent, such as shouting or lashing out at others. Never take their anger personally. Another personality type is those who think the sky is falling; those are the people who tend to list out every little thing that's going wrong. They tend to feel sorry for themselves and blow things out of proportion; and listening to them or consoling them is about all you can do until they're ready to make some changes.

Many people claim that the best way to relax is to have a drink after coming home from work. Is that a good way to relax?

You may even be thinking, "There's nothing like kicking back and enjoying a beer after a hard day." Unwinding while you enjoy a glass of wine or a beer is something you should use cautiously as a stress management technique. Making drinking a habit is a stress relief that can backfire badly. There are other techniques that should be only used once in a while, such as gambling, because using these too often will land you in hot water. One more thing - holding back can build up pressures, but being diplomatic is important if you're going to speak your mind. Always think before you speak, and drinking could hinder that good judgment.

Is writing a good way to manage stress?

Many people enjoy writing, and it can be an excellent way to manage stress and have you feeling better about yourself. Here's how the theory works: when you write down your thoughts and emotions, you're letting off the pressure. Keeping a journal or a diary is a great way to let things out, and you won't have to face the fear of rejection or judgment from other people. There's another added benefit of keeping a journal: You can look back on what you've written and find patterns of behaviour or some emotions that keep coming back. Once you figure out what bothers you, you'll be able to start working on yourself or changing how you react to other people, which will make you feel more relaxed and less frustrated about things that happen.

There are a lot of people struggling with financial situations these days, who may feel they don't have the money to take weekend vacations or subscribe to the gym. What can they do to relieve their stress?

Managing your stress and relaxing isn't about spending money or putting yourself in debt. There are lots of things to do that relieve tension that are free or don't cost much money at all. Being with friends and getting sociable is one way, because when you're with people whose company you enjoy, you'll laugh more, smile a lot and naturally relax. Reading is a great, quiet way to forget your worries and visiting a library is free. Knitting is also a very calming hobby and therapists actually recommend knitting for anxiety! Taking walks is plenty of physical exercise, or you could do a quick workout routine in your own home every day or two. Remember, you don't need to spend a lot of money to go to the spa to relax - all you have to do is find activities or hobbies you enjoy and start doing them!